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Text A Thinking as a Hobby（第1页）

TextAThinkingasaHobby

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WilliamGolding

[1]WhileIwasstillaboy，Icametothethattherewerethreegradesofthinking;andsinceIwaslatertokingasmyhobby，Ievenstrangerely，thatImyselfotthinkatall.

[2]Imusthavebeenanunsatisfactorychildfrowh.Irememberhowiheyappearedtomeatfirst，butnot，ofcourse，hoearedtothem.Itwastheheadmasterofmygrammarschohtthesubjekihoughheway，norwiththeresultheintended.Hehadsomestatuettesinhisstudy.Theystoodonahighcupboardbehindhisdesk.Onewasaladywearingnothingbutabathtowel.Sheseemedfrozeernalpahebathtowelslipdownanyfarther，andsinceshehadnoarms，shewasinanuiontopullthetowelupagaioher，crouchedthestatuetteofaleopard，readytdodrawerofafililabeledA-AH.Myierpretedthisasthevictim’slast，despairiheleopardwasanaked，mustleman，whosat，lookingdown，withhishisfistandhiselbowonhiskerlymiserable.

[3]Sometimelater，Ilearhesestatuettes.Theheadmasterhadplacedthemwheretheywouldfaquent，becausetheysymbolizedtohimtowholeoflife.ThenakedladywastheVenusofMilo.ShewasLove.Shewashetowel.ShewasjustbusybeiheleopardwasNature，andhewasbeingnatural.Thenaked，mustlemanwasnotmiserable.HewasRodin’sThinker，animageht.Itiseasytobuysmallplastermodelsofwhatyouthinklifeislike.

[4]IhadbetterexplainthatIwasafrequentvisitortotheheadmaster’sstudy，becauseofthelatestthingIhaddoundone.Asased.Iwas，ifanything，disied;andIuzzled.Grownupsnevermadesense.WheneverIfoundmyselfiioheheadmaster’sdesk，withthestatuettesglimmeringwhitelyabovehim，Iwouldsinkmyhead，claspmyhandsbehindmybadwritheoheother.

[5]Theheadmasterwouldlookopaquelyatmethroughflashiacles.“Whatarewegoingtodowithyou?”

&weretheygoingtodowithme?Iwouldwrithemyshoesomemoreathew.

[7]“Lookup，boy!’tyoulookup?”

[8]ThenIwouldlookatthecupboard，wherethenakedladywasfrozeninherpanidthemustlemahehiheleopardinendlessgloom.Ihadnothingtosaytotheheadmaster.Hisspectaclescaughtthelightsothatyoucouldseenothinghumahem.Thereossibilityofuni.

[9]“Dohinkatall?”

[10]No，Ididn’tthink，wasn’tthinking，’tthink—Ilywaitinginanguishfortheiop.

[11]“Theerlearn—hadn’tyou?”

[12]Ononeotheheadmasterleapedtohisfeet，readplonkedRodin’smasterpiethedeskbeforeme.

[13]“That’swhatamanlookslikewhehinking.”

[14]Isurveyedthegehoutiorprehension.

[15]“Gobacktoyourclass.”

[16]Clearlytherewassomethingmissiurehadeofthehumahasixthse.Thismustbeso，Imused，onmywaybacktothecewhetherIhadbrokenawindow，orfailedtorememberBoyle’sLaw，orbeenlateforsyteaeoanswer:“Why’tyouthink?”

[17]AsIsawthecase，IhadbrokenthewindowbecauseIhadtriedtohitJaeywithacricketballandmissedhim;IberBoyle’sLawbecauseIhadheredtolearnit;andIwaslateforschoolbecauseIpreferredlookihebridgeintotheriver.Infact，Ieremyteachers，perhaps，sogoodthattheyotuhedepthsofmydepravity?Weretheytormentedpeoplewhocoulddirecttheireveryabythismysteriousbusihihingrehensible.Inmyearlieryears，IfouatuetteoftheThinkerg.Ididnotbelieveanyofmyteacherswerenaked，ever.Likesomeobitterlydetermiofindoutaboutsound，Iwatchedmyteacherstofindoutaboutthought.

[18]TherewasMr.Houghton.Hewasalwaystellihink.Withamodestsatisfa，hewouldtellthathehadthoughtabithimself.Thenwhydidhespendsomuchtimedrinking?Orwastheremoresenseindrinkingthanthereappearedtobe?Butifnot，andifdriruih—andMr.Houghtonwasruiherewasnodoubtaboutthat—aystalkingaboutthelifeauesoffreshair?Hewouldspreadhisarmswidewiththeaanwhohabituallyspenthistimestridingalongmes.

[19]“Openairdoesmegood，boys—Iknowit!”

[20]Sometimes，exaltedbyhisownoratory，hefromhisdeskasideintoahideouswind.

[21]“Now，boys!Deepbreaths!FeelitrightdowninsideyhtsofGod’sgoodair!”

[22]Hewouldstandbefihealth，anopen-airman.Hewouldputhishandsonhiswaistaremeh.Youcouldheartheedintheofhisdstrugglingwithalltheunnaturalimpediments.Hisbodywouldreelwithshodhisruieattheuioaggerbacktohisdeskandcollapsethere，uselessfortherest.

[23]Mr.Houghtoohigh-mindedmohegoodlife，sexlessandfullofduty.Yetinthemiddleofohesemonologues，ifagirlpassedtheingalolittlefeet，hewouldihisdiscourse，hisneckwouldturnofitselfandhewouldwatchheroutofsight.Inthisinstaomerulednotbythoughtbutbyaninvisibleaiblespringinhisnape.

[24]Hisneobjectofgreatiome.Normallyitbulgedabitoverhiscollar.

[25]ButMr.HoughtonhadfoughtiWsidebothAmeridFrendhade—byhatillogic?—toasettleddetestationofbothtries.Ifeithertryhappeobepromiiaffairs，akeMr.Houghto.Hewouldbangthedesk，hisneckwouldbulgestillfurtherandgored.“Yousaywhatyoulike，”

hewouldcry，“butI’vethoughtaboutthis—andIknowwhatIthink!”

[26]Mr.Houghtonthoughtwithhisneck.

[27]Therearsons.Sheassuredusthatherdearestelfare，butIkhen，withthemysteriousceofchildhood，thatwhatshewawasthehusbaherewasMr.Hands—andsoon.

[28]Ihavedealtatlengthwithmyteachersbecausethiswasmyintrodutotheiso.ThroughthemIdiscoveredthatthoughtisoftenfullofunsciousprejudiorandhypocrisy.Itwillledisiywhileitsnegremorselesslytwistedtowardaskirt.Teically，itisaboutasprofitasmostbusinessmen’sgolf，ashoasmostpolititentions，or—toyowioasmostbooksthatgetwritten.ItiswhatIcametocallgrade-threethinking，thoughmoreproperly，itisfeelihought.

[29]True，oftenthereisakindofinnoprejudices，butinthosedaysIviewedgrade-threethinkingwithaemptandaninockery.IdelightedtotapiousladywhohatedtheGermanswiththepropositionthatweshouldloveouremeagreattruthihgrade-threethinkers;becauseofher，Inolongerdismisslightlyamentalprocesswhie-tenthsofthepopulatiotheywillevergettothought.Theyhaveimmensesolidarity.Wehadbetterrespectthem，forweareoutnumberedandsurrounded.Acrowdofgrade-threethinkers，allshoutihing，allwarmingtheirhandsatthefireoftheirownprejudices，willnotthankyoutthetraditheirbeliefs.Manisagregariousanimal，andeascowswillgrazeallthesamewayonthesideofahill.

[30]Grade-twothinkiionoftradis.Ireachedgradetwoedthepoor，piouslady.Grade-twothistampedeeasily，thoughoftentheyfalliherfaultandlagbehihinkingisaitheyesandearsopen.Itbecamemyhobbyandbroughtsatisfadloherhand.Frade-twothiroyswithouthaviocreate.ItsetmewatgthecrHisMajestytheKingandaskiallthefusswasabout，withoutgivihingpositivetoputintheplaceofthatheadypatriotism.Buttherewerepensations.Tohearpeoplejustifytheirhabitofhueariopiecesbygthatthefoxeslikeit.ToherourPrimeMialkaboutthegreatbeweferredonIndiabyjailingpeoplelikePanditNehruandGandhi.TohearAmeripolitistalkaboutpeaesenteojointheLeagueofNatio.Yes，thereweremome.

[31]ButIardadolesdhadtoadmitthatMr.Houghtonwasnottheohaiblespringioo，feltthepulsivehandantofindthatpointingouttradicouldbecostlyaswellasfuh，forexample，aseriousandattractivegirl.Iwasahetime.Grade-twothinkiionandknosectslikeskittles.Iputmyselfinapositioedbyherradethree.ShewasaMethodist—oratleast，herparehhadtofollowsuit.But，alas，insteadontheHolySpirittoe，Ruthwasfoolishenoughtoopehi.SheclaimedthattheBible（KingJamesVersion）ired.IteredbysayingthattheCatholicsbelievedieralinspirationofSaie，awobookswerediffereflagged.

[32]AtlastsheremarkedthattherewereanawfullotofMethodistsandthey’tbewrong，couldthey—notallthosemillions?Thatwastooeasy，saidIrestively（fortheneareryouweretoRuth，theobeo）sihereweremoreRomanCatholiMethodistsanyway;andthey’tbewrong，couldthey—notallthosehundredsofmillions?Anawfulflickerofdoubtappearedinhereyes.Islidmyarmrouahlesslythatifweweregheads，theBuddhistsweretheboysformymohhasreallywaodomegood，becauseIwassoionofmyarmalessBuddhistswastoomuchforher.

[33]Thathervisitedmyfathera，red-dindignant.IwasgivehirddegreetofindoutewasluckywewerebothofusoRuthandgainedanuionasapoteine.

[34]Sograde-twothinkingcouldbedawasinthiskheageoffifteen，thatIremembermakiheheightsofgradetwo，oionsofgradethree.OneeveningIfoundmyselfaloheschoolhall，preparingitforaparty.Thedooroftheheadmaster’sstudyeheheadmasterhadpRodin’sThinkerdownonthedeskasaheyoung.Perhapshehadnotfoundaes，butthestatuetteswerestillthere，glimmeringaontopofthecupboard.IstoodonadrearraoodVeowelonthefilihathtitsbreathinagaspofsexyext.“A-ah!”