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附录一 What I Believe1（第1页）

附录一WhatIBelieve[1]

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Myfather，Hu，wasasdamanwillandadmiy.Afteraperiodofclassiiureandhistory，hetookgreatihestudyofgeography，espethegeographyofthefrontierprovioPekingand，withaletterofintroduhispocket，traveled42daystoKirininNorthernManchuriatoseetheImperialissioa-，ntoEuropeanSinologuesasoarchaeologistsina.

Wureceivedhimahe.“Nothing，”

saidmyfather，“exceptletmefollowyourmissioheboundarydisputewithRussia，sothatImaystudythegeographyoftheernprovinces.”

WuwasihisscholarwhohadtakenonlyhisfirstdegreeieraryexaminationsandeerthelosidetheGreatWall.Hetooktheyoungmanwithhimonhishistoriandfoundhimamostvaluableandhard-wassistant.

&imemyfather’spartylostitswayinaandotgetoutfor3days.Provisioedaeringhadfailedwheasearchbemadefstreams，whichrobabilityflowoutoftheforest.Astreamwasfouyfolloweditscoursetosafety.Myfatherposedaloocelebratethiso.WheerIusedthisiasanillustrationinapaperonProfessorJohheoryofsystematig，severalsurvivingayfatherstillreizedthissthIhadionedhisname，aoinquireifIwasayoungerson-departedfriend.

AlthoughWuTa-meothegoveras“amancapableprovinces，”

myfatherneverachievedpolitiierbeinganoffigsuandFormosa，diedattheageof55whenFormosawascededtoJapaheSino-Japanese>

*　*　*　*

Iwastheyousonofmyfatherandtheonlyother.Hemarriedthreetimes.ThefirstwifewaskillediaipingRebellion，whiyhomedistrisouthernAnhuiaoashes.Byasearriagehehadthreesonsandfhters.Theeldestsoobeanincibledegeanearlyage.Whehissedwife，hewrotehomethathehaddearryagirlofthegood，sturdystockofthefarmerclass.

Mymother’sfatherwasafarmerracticedtailtheoffmonthsoftheyear.HearespectablefamilywhichwasmassagtheTaipingRebellion.Beingonlyasmallboy，hetiveaoserveinthearmyoftheTaipings.Topreventhimfraway，fourcharacters—“Tai-pingTien-kuo”

（HeavenlyKiingPeace）—werebrandedonhisfadremaihroughouthislife.Buthemaoesd，afterterriblehardship，returohishomeonlytofinditieruinswithoutasinglememberofhisfamilyleftalive.Heworkedhard，ghislandandpragtail，whichhehadlearcamp.Hegrewup，married，andhadfourymotherwastheeldest.

Mygrandfather’slifeambitionwastorebuildthefamilydwelliroyedbytheTaipings.Everymbeforesunrisehewouldgototheriverside，selectthreeheavyloadsofstone，aripscarrythemonhisshoulderpoletothesiteofhisruiheartularworkinthefieldorintail.Wheureiernoon，hewouldmakethreemoretripsandcarrythreemoreloadsofstoneforhisfuturehousebeforehesatdowhishardandperseveringworkwassilentlywitnessedbymymother，whrettedthat，beingagirl，shewasunableinanywaytolighteher’shardshipaherealizationofhisdream.

&hematchmakerwhometmygrahefieldandpleadedeloquentlyonbehalfofmyfatherforthe“birthdate”

paperofhiseldestdaughter.Mygraedtotalkitoverwithhisfamily.Butwheheproposaltohiswifeintheevening，shewasveryfurious.“Never!”

shesaid，“Howyouthinkofgivinghtertoaman30yearsolderthanshe?Andsomeofhisareolderthanhter!Moreover，peoplewillnaturallythinkthatwe，ingivingirltoanelderlyofficialaresagherforthesakeofmoability.”

Sotheoldcouplequarreled.Ihefathersaid，“Letussultthegirlherself.Afterall，it’shero>

&hequestionlaothersheremai，aswasusualwithesegirlsinasimilarsituatiohinkis.Tomarryamiddle-agedn-upmeantthattheoothebride’sfamilywouldbemuchmorethaninane.Thatwouldbeagreathelptoherfather’sbuildis.Andshehadseenmyfatherbeforeahewasreveredbyeverybodyi.Sheadoredhim，andwaswillingtomarryhim，partlybecauseofasenseofheroworship，butchieflybecauseofherfilialafather.Sowhensheressedbyherparentsforananswer，shesaidresolutely:“Ifyouthinkheisagoodman，I’llobey.Afterall，amanofforty-sevenisnotveryold.”

Mygrandfathersighedwithreliefwhe，andmygraoutifury:“Soyouwaai（lady）ofamandaribe!”

*　*　*　*

Mymotherwasmarriedin1889attheageof17，andIwasborninDecember，1891.Myfatherdiedin1895，leavingmymotherawidowat23.Byhisdeath，shebecameheadefamilywithmanygrown-upstep.Thepositionofaesestepmotherisproverbiallydiffidherlifefromthistimeoeriodofpatientsufferingandpainstakingise.

MymiftwasforbearaoryrecordsthateroroftheTangdyriargKung-ibylehisfamilyhadmaolivetogetherfeionswithoutseparationordivision，thegrandoldmaospeak，requestedleavetowriteouthisanswer，aeahuheword“Forbearaheesemoraliststlycitethisstoryofthe“HundredForbearahebestexampleoffamilylife，buthemseemsevertorealizetheterribleamount，fri，suppression，andinjusticewhichhavemadeforbearanabsolutey.

Ill-feeling，dagger-likewords，hostilelooksoofthestepdaughters-in-law—mymotherboreallthispatieimesshefoundherselfreagherlimitofforbearaheayihemalyweepaltheearlylossofherhusbaioheoffendingdaughter-in-lawnortheoffeimethesetearshadanalmostmiraculouseffect.Iwouldinvariablyhearadooropenintheroomofoers-in-law，aepsofawomanwalkiio.Presentlyshewouldreturnandknockatthedoorofourroom.Shewouldehacupofteaaomymother，implhertoceaseweeping.Mymotherwouldtakethedaccepthersilentapologies.Thentherewouldbepeathefamilyforaboutamonth.

Althoughsheeitherreadherstakedallherhopeoion.IrecociousdbeforeIwasthreehadlearnedover800characters，whichmyfathertaughtmeeverydayonsquareslipsofpileafterthree，Iwasalreadyinschool.Iwasthenasicklydcouldhardlyclimbadoorstepof6in.withoutassistaIcouldreadandmemorizebetterthaherboysintheseverplayedwiththeofthevillageand，bepletelackofchildplay，IwasgiventheniameofShieer）whenIwasfive.Fifteeer，ativersity，Iwasniamed“DoIhomore，andforthissame>

Mymothereverydaybeforedaybreakaupihentellmeallshekmyfather.Shewouldsaythatsheexpectedmetofollowthefootstepsofhimwhowastoherthebestahateverlived，amanwho，shesaid，wassomuchrespectedthatallopiumdensandgambliheviitysuspendedbusinessduringhisoalsojouroldmethatIandheronlybymygooddbyatsinscholarshipandiexaminations—thatwhatevershewassufferingwouldberewardedbymydiligentappliystudies.Iwouldoftehhalf-opesherarelygaveupthismsermowhensomeladyguestwasstayingwithusinthesameroom.

Whendaylightcame，shewoulddressmeaoschool.Wheleolder，Iwasalwaysthefirsttoarriveatskeacher’sdoorforthekeytoopentheschoolgate.ThekeywashahroughthesmallcrevithetwodoorsandIwassooreadingaloudmyassigheschoolwasnotdismissedtilldusk，wheneachboybowedtothebigpictureoffurubbingaeadweheaveragelengthoftheschooldaywas12h.

Whileallowingmenochildplayofanykind，mymavemeeveryeinmychildishattempttobuildatempleofworshipte，fucius.Ilearhisfromthesohalf-sister，aboy5yearsmysenior.Hehadbuiltapapertempleoffuciuswithallkindseouscolorpapers，anditattractedme.IusedabigpaperboxasthemainhallofworshipandcutabigsquareholeonitsbacktowhichIpastedasmallerpaperboxastheinhetabletoffucius.TheouterhallwhereIplacedthegreatdiscipleswasdecoratedwithminiaturesrittehegreatsageiedfrommyempleandpartlyfrombooks.Iickswerefrequentlyburoytempleandmymotherrejoimychildishpiety，secretlybelievingthatthespiritoffuciuswouldsurelyrewardmebymakingmearenownedsdsuccessfuldidateieraryexaminations.

MyfatherwasaclassicalsdasterheNeo-istRationalPhilosophyofChuHsi（1130–1200A.D.）.HewasstronglyopposedtoBuddhismandTaoism.Irememberseeingonthedoorofmyuncle’shouse（whichwasmyfirstschool）asun-bleabearingthewords“NoAlmsforBuddhistMonksorTaoistPriests，”

which，IlearerartoftheRationalisttraditiobymyfather.Butmyfatherwasdead，myscholarlyunlefthometobeeapettyoffiorthernAnhui，aherswereinShanghai.

ThewomehomewereundernoobligatiohisRationalistiyfather.Theyobservedtheusualritesofaorworshipaoworshipwhereverandoledthem.Kwan-yin，theGoddessofMercy，wastheirfavoritedeity，andmymother，chieflyoutofherayformyhealthandwell-being，wasadevoutbelieverofKwan-yin.Iremembergoingwithheretoatempleofthisgoddessonamountaieofthebouwhiedherthroughoutherlife，walkedthewholedistanceofhillytrailtoandfromtheshrine.

Iwasinthevillageschool，ofwhichthereweresevenine，for9years（1895–19whichtimeIreadahefollowingbooks:

1.TheBookofFilialPiety，apost-classio.

&aryLessons（or“TheSmallLearning”

），abookofNeo-istmoralteaonlyattributedtotheSungphilosopher，ChuHsi.

3.TheFourBooks:TheAsoffucius，TheBookofMeLearniriheMean.

4.FouroftheFiveClassics:TheBookofPoetry，TheBookofHistory，TheBookofdTheLiKi.